Because FAN is short for FANATIC

What goes down when I watch the best sport ever
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When I watched night one of the Olympic Trials… (part one)

Before the damn thing even got started THIS happened

We got our first look at Nastia, and I just wanted to be like

When post-concussion Maroney opened our night of gymnastics with this

I was like

And I’m pretty sure over at Round Lake, Alexandrov was all like

And then my sentimental favorite Rebecca Bross hit a solid, if not spectacular bar set,  and I was like

And then Raisman did her Yurchenko Coathanger, to which I am always like

And then I noticed NBC had added some dumb meaningless arrow scheme to their scoring and I was like

A few more routines and Price busted out a solid Amanar and I’m fairly sure Alexandrov was all

And then came Nastia’s eagerly anticipated bar routine, which finished like this

To which everyone whose name is not Elfi was like

Good try though Nast.

Jordyn landed a pretty freaking locked legged Amanar to which I’m always like

And then John Geddert was clapping and celebrating like it wasn’t scary hyper-extended or anything to which I just want to say

Then Gabby got stuck in handstand on bars

which had me thinking…

But thank jesus she DIDN’T, and pulled it together which gave me a moment of pure celebration like

Aly Raisman kicked off rotation two by essentially spitting on the uneven bars


That happy dance for Gabby pulling through was tiring, so I took an opportunity for a much needed nap  while Kyla balanced checked her way through a bunch of leaps and aerials

Thankfully Sarah Finnegan blessed us with HER beam shortly after..

even though Elfi continued to blather on about her being too young and inexperienced despite the fact that she continued to hit better than most of the veterans out there

How the fuck she managed to save that Arabian AND connect it, I will never know and I sat there during the replay like

But she did, so shove it Elfie.

Wieber muscled her way through bars as per usual

Nonetheless, not even I could be a nasty old bitch about this part

Thankfully we got glimpse of Ryan Wieber and I sat there like

Ryan Wieber will be my favorite Wieber in London…..


Despite obviously being out of it, Nastia did NOT scratch, sucked it up, and did a decent, if not spectacular beam routine.


Taking digs at Nastia is MY Olympic sport, and in many cases she’s had it coming, but for the reigning All Around AA champ to show up true to her word and give it her best effort despite the inevitable fall on her ass in front of everyone, and to make no excuses for it afterwords when going to her shoulder would have been an out the media would have happily given her…. I say props Nast..

And since it’s a positive note, that’s where we’ll end part one of night one…

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